Year of the Rat

Original Article: Saturday Supple-ment to Ming Pao Daily News, 1996-2-10 Issue.

RAT (1948, 1960, 1972, 1984)
Honestly, this year sucks rocks. Even if you run from disaster, you can't hide from it, so be on your guard! You'll encounter family and scholastic problems but don't give up trying_if one stone slips, then there will be a landslide. Specifically, your scholastic problems will snowball. You will tend to daydream a lot this year. You will reap no fruits from your labour. In April, all your school troubles will vanish. As for the land of love, stay out of quarrels_otherwise, you are doomed. If you're married, you better open the communication channels. If you're in love, then there will be a love triangle, but stay calm. If you're single, watch out in June for Cupid's arrows! In October, there will be blue skies and Cupid will visit often. Health wise, you are highly accident-prone this year_you are bound to end up in a cast if you take risks. Your gastrointestinal tract is bound to malfunction sometime or another.

OX (1949, 1961, 1973, 1985)
Present problems will become those of the past as your saviour will soon appear. Your year starts and ends well, but don't expect much in between. However, the world won't cave in on your head, so don't stress. Scholastically speaking, keep working at a steady pace to keep things running smoothly. Keep your emotions in check_it's only school, not the end of the world. In August, watch out for a back-stabbing gossip, but keep on people's good sides. Romantically, there will be admirers left, right and centre, all waiting for you to make the first move. If you are married, then this is a booby-trap. September will be hot, hot, hot. In October, you meet someone for whom you lust but things were just not meant to be. Keep a tight leash on your raging hormones or that may be your downfall. Financially, you're in a hole until May when fortune finally smiles upon you. Health wise, you will have a mental breakdown due to severe stress. You will eat and drink yourself to a tragic ending. Watch out for cavities.

TIGER (1950, 1962, 1974, 1986)
Last year was disastrous, but you have smartened up and learned from your mistakes. If you work hard, you can conquer anything. To be sure of this, you should scrub yourself with Chinese grapefruit leaves when showering. Scholastically, plan ahead of time and success will follow. Don't keep academic stress bottled up. Take crap from your profs with a smile, and rewards will come in time. If you are thinking of being in a partnership, think twice! In March, keep a tight rein on your tongue. Romantically, the spring breeze will induce amorous feelings. Peach blossoms will bloom. If you woo your love interest, then sparks will fly. In March, if you are single you will develop a crush_but don't rush things. In June there will be a love triangle. Because of work, you might unintentionally pay less attention to your loved one. In May, there will be a small pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. In November, fortune will rain down on you. Health wise, you are prone to an infectious eye disease.

RABBIT (1951, 1963, 1975, 1987)
This is your year!!! Be prepared for a joyful family celebration! Buy more red apparel. However, don't get too excited or you will say something to offend someone. This year, there are no shortcuts_only the brute force method. Careerwise, you might have to do some traveling. Focus your energy on one goal. In May, you debate who your true friends are, and you are betrayed. In October, reorganize your plans and be prepared to swim upstream. Stick with the law, not with luck, or hasta la vista! Romantically, peach blossoms are everywhere! Your love life is an elaborate 12 course meal. You won't finish it nor will you be able to get a doggy bag, so eat carefully or you'll end up with an upset stomach. In August, you have over imaginative daydreams. In October, you will be dangerously intoxicated with the nectar of passion_if you take advantage of this, then you will find your perfect other. Seeing that you are virtually drunk with desire, you must fight to maintain your sense of logic. Health wise, you will be emotionally unstable, you will have foot problems, and you will be worn out by your love life.

DRAGON (1952, 1964, 1976, 1988)
This is NOT your year_be prepared to be dragged into court. Abide by the rules and keep a low profile. Stand your ground and face the music. Show compassion towards others and tomorrow will be a better day. Careerwise, quietly observe the changes around you. Lots of work to do. If you are too hasty, then it will all be for nothing. In July, beware of a booby-trap. In September, watch out for backstabbers_if you fall in a well, not only will they not help you, but they will drop stones to bury you. Romantically, watch out for a cheating spouse if you are married. If you are seeing someone, your relationship is not on a strong foundation. Lovers' quarrels will easily arise_if you don't handle with care, then separation is inevitable. In September, you will get a confirmation in your love life. Avoid going to establishments of questionable repute. Luck is looking a sickly green. Save your potatoes for a rainy day. Any calamity befalling you will most likely involve water. Sleep more as you are prone to headache and stuffy nose.

SNAKE (1953, 1965, 1977, 1989)
This year will bring you much fortune! Your career/scholastics climbs higher and higher! Be on top of things and plan ahead. Arrogance will only lead you to failure. There are many around who will help you_you will only need half your own effort and you will get twice the results! Your luck will not run dry, but you will still need to work hard. Romantically, your relationship was meant to be. There will be some rocky roads but in the end, everything will work out. Because of school/work, you will not be able to spend enough time with your loved one. If you have just recently started a new relationship, you are completely blinded by your feelings_remember to be responsible for your actions! You have a lot of choices to make in the area of love. In November, beware of burglars. Health wise, all is going well. Drink more water to prevent that morning breath from lingering around all day. Near the end of the year, you will have a minor operation.

HORSE (1954, 1966, 1978, 1990)
Your year appears to be sweet but it'll actually suck lemons. Your problems multiply like frisky rabbits and you'll find yourself in hot water often. Your personal life and your family will encounter stormy weather. The roads ahead are winding_take each step with care. In your darkest hour, you will triumph. Scholastically, changes are everywhere and much will be on your mind. You will be constantly challenged by people who want to gain control over you. In April, luck smiles upon you. In August, your luck will turn on you. Romantically, your love life has been shot with a tranquilizer dart and is like a boring bowl of plain congee. If you are not involved in a relationship then sorry! please try again next year. If you are involved, then you will have many lovers' quarrels. If you are married, be a little more caring than usual, and things will be fine. You definitely have many admirers hot on your tail, but any attempts at a relationship will result in a split-up. In August, do NOT invest. Health wise, you will ail and may even see your own blood splattered across the pavement.

GOAT (1955, 1967, 1979, 1991)
Your sign conflicts with that of the rat this year_your year will only be so-so. Problems propagate but in the middle of the year you will have some hope of solving them. Luck is running low. If you can't handle something, immediately ask for help. You won't be motivated to work hard in school. In July, opportunity will knock so answer it promptly! However, the end of your year dies off in a pathetic fizzle. Romantically, you must make the first move and make things happen! Don't let the chance pass you by. Tolerance is the key during times of difficulty in your relationship. Stay calm to maintain a rational point of view. Do NOT let jealous rages get the best of you. There will be a third party, but that will not jeopardize your relationship. In August, if you are single, chances are you will find your dream lover. Although many will try to get a date with you, do not let this go to your head and think that you are the epitome of your sex. Health wise, you may break a few bones and will get migraines.

MONKEY (1944, 1956, 1968, 1980)
Your luck will be like a sine wave but you'll survive. Your love life and health has hit bottom. Scholastically and professionally, you will encounter obstacles. In June, someone will lend you a hand to boost your career but in the second half of the year, your luck will run dry. Know when to be aggressive and when to be defensive. The end of the year will suck lemons. Romantically, there are storms in your waters. It will be near impossible to achieve anything. You will fall madly in love with someone, but there will be a third party obstructing any further developments. Don't expect anything to happen_it's just a crush. In October, if you are a single female, you will meet Mr. Right. Always remember to love with the heart, not with the eyes_true beauty shines from within. Health wise, you may run into trouble with your lungs and with your gastrointestinal tract. You are prone to getting oral diseases.

ROOSTER (1945, 1957, 1969, 1981)
This year is fairly good. With your persistent and hard working attitude, if you answer when opportunity knocks, then you will find success. Your life will be as colourful as the rainbow. Scholastically there will be much pressure and many changes. Be alert of your surroundings. Many annoying people will try to intimidate you but pay no attention to them. In May, someone will be your happy helper. Use this opportunity to achieve your goals. June and July won't be too great but in September, the sun will shine. Romantically, things will be colourful and exciting. If you are single, then you are indeed a hot item wanted by many. But take the time to pay careful attention. If you are married, then everything is in harmony. In November, small problems will arise. At the end of the year, all will be all rosy again, and there may be wedding bells! April is a good month of fertility and fortune. Health wise, you are very mentally distressed. Stay away from narcotics. Watch out for contagious diseases.

DOG (1946, 1958, 1970, 1982)
This year will improve slightly. Have patience. If you feel like a simpleton, then you can improve your intellect through hard work. Be prepared for a travel as that will bring you many benefits. You will experience a significant change in your scholastics and career and will find much hardship. Remember to be humble. In June, there will be much competition but you will find help, resulting in success. In October, a little bird will bring you luck. Romantically speaking, you will encounter a meal of many flavours_sweetness, bitterness, sourness and saltiness. Things are looking unstable. In April, you will have an admirer on your tail, but that may not be the right person for you. Control your temper and don't quarrel. In November, an obstacle will present itself to your relationship. Financially, you may acquire profits at times, but with much sweat, blood and tears. Health wise, you will be fine, but you must pay attention when in traffic_otherwise, you may find your guts flying across the street. You eat too much for your own good_go burn some calories!

PIG (1947, 1959, 1971, 1983)
This is your year! Keep focused on what's ahead. You need to reflect on your actions constantly. Take on challenges presented to you. The stars are aligned in such a way as to optimize your fame and fortune. In April, keep a tight rein on your tongue lest your career be destroyed. In July, the sun smiles down on you. In November, opportunity knocks non-stop. Romantically, your relationship is like a game of virtual reality_everything is just a big illusion. If you are currently involved, then you'll probably experience a break-up. If you are single, then you have many admirers, but don't become too involved with them. In July, lovers' quarrels will arise, and you don't spend much time with your other half. If you don't correct the situation, then it's game over. Investments may burn a hole in your wallet. In June, your luck picks up momentum but don't take shortcuts to get things done. Watch out for burglars. Health wise, be extra careful when around stairs. Gastro-intestinal problems may arise. Cut down on the late-night outings. Your blood may get splattered in all directions. Watch out for the flu and cold bugs.

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